Prince Billy & Tortoise – Thunder Road, My Morning Jacket – Off The Record, Outkast - Bombs Over Baghdad Stimulated Remix, Ratatat - Nostrand, Slave feat. Steve Arrington – Weak At The Knees, Earth, Wind, & Fire – Keep Your Head To The Sky, Dick Dale – Nitro
Oh man, oh man. The folks at Pause Police are too good at what they’re doing. Almost so good that they’re gonna get poached by XXL and made to work for back issues containing cologne inserts.
Their most recent adventures in patrolling the internets for statements made with ghey potential took us on a magical tour in the life of Diddy. A man who has no personal boundaries and is free to reinvent the boundaries of others to suit his whims.
I laughed, I cried, I ate sugar cookies and drank the finest Cambodian Breastmilks.
These are the real, every night Atlanta Hawks, not the ones who play as five equals. Far too easy to see that there’s no clear floor leader and no respected, been there veteran. They’re a poor man’s version of the Portland Trailblazers, without all of the great coach baggage.
What a difference between the respective second round debuts by Cleveland and LA with both being off for an extended period after quick first rounds. The Lakers appear to think too much and it starts to get in their way, causing people to hesitate on good shots, rush bad shots and dribble or pass the ball too many times. The lack of a strong back court running mate for Kobe, coupled with a rational dearth of confidence in Trevor Ariza’s activities anywhere beyond 15 feet mean the ball is in Kobe’s hands too much.
Idle hands are the devil’s work for Kobe to the tune of 32 points on 31 field goal attempts, more glaring when a mere 6 free throw attempts are factored in. The Lake could really used a second scorer amongst the small guys and I wonder what Adam Morrison’s status is and if he’ll see daylight next season. Kobe is still going to be Top 5 next season, but the window is getting smaller.
Ask Kevin Garnett.
Atlanta Hawks 72, Cleveland Cavaliers 99
Jasper says, “That’s a paddlin’.”
Down low rappers. Watch your back [||].
Internets wannabe sexy men aka guidos. Watch your back [||].
The Pause Police are out to get you.
Oh, and especially if you’ve ever worked for Cash Money records.
Houston Rocket + Tru Warier + Funny Dude aka Ron “Ron-Ron” Artest
crossed with
Iconic Ethiopian + South Park Lesson Teacher + International Man of Man of Hunger aka Starvin’ Marvin
equals to
Tormentor of Rafer Alston and Anthony Johnson + Seeming Heir to Andre Miller’s Hair Throne aka Louis Williams
Andy V grew up in Brazil and Bron still put it on him like that? Now we could always go and j’accuse Varejao of taking the scourge of flopping all the way to the bench and overselling what LBJ was cooking up. I bring this up because he’s well known for pulling the chair out from under himself on defense, egregious enough to the point of the flop being featured at the epilogue of his wiki.
Now peep the grin on James’ face. That’s ice cold.
Dude probably ate something high octane before tip-off and that it snaked right out of his warm ups not unlike some exhaust.
Do you have a favorite NBA farter?
Did you drop a little sak passe with Sam “SBD” Dalembert?
Ever sat on the bench and felt the rumble of Robert Swift’s thunder?
My perennial favorite is Dikembe Mutombo Mpolondo Mukamba “Toots” Jean Jacque Wamutombo aka Cookie Monster aka The Congolese Colon
via wshh.com
Here’s my starting five of guys likely to be disgusted by farting:
G Kobe Bryant
G/F Grant Hill
F/C Pau Gasol
F Richard Jefferson
F/C Mark Madsen
Amare’s no dummy. A player of his stature knows when his time is short for that team, ’specially a really bright guy. From my perspective, Amare fell out of love with the Suns when they traded Marion for Shaq (though I have no clue if he and Marion were down) and possibly before that when Phoenix couldn’t figure out if they wanted to run.
Ken Berger @ CBS discusses a Stoudemire to Portland scenario that makes a solid case for both teams.
Phoenix gets LaMarcus Aldridge, Jerryd Bayless and Raef LaFrentz’s expiring $12.7M Golden Phoenix Sizzling Wor-Bar Surprise contract.
An NBA trade…that actually makes sense for all parties as it is the rarest of rumors that fulfills my “To whom, for what?” standard.
Phoenix is solid in the center position with the lesser Lopez (though they are equally inconsistent which is endearing and odd) in development and Shaq doing whatever he does every other game. I’d say that by this time next year, Shaq would be entirely more effective off the bench, playing against 2nd team centers and putting up starter’s numbers in more limited action.
Aldridge does present the same problems that Amare does in a mirror image. L.A. likes to keep it on the perimeter and beyond, adding some post moves to his game this year, still suffering from Rasheed Wallace Syndrome. This afflicts players 6′10″ or taller and keeps them from regularly driving to the basket and easily breaking down their man off the dribble. Currently, the only known cure is video of Kevin Garnett presented by Malcolm McDowell.
The Steve Nash Express is about to go local. Dude was exhausted after his 21 dime performance last week and it’s not going to get any better. Remember, Steve’s rookie year was 1996/97 and out of that draft class, not too many guys are looking so fresh right now. Even Kobe is playing through injury and has added a whole lot more old man to his game in recent seasons.
Bayless is a smallish dude that has more Barbosa [||] in him than Nash, but does a whole lot more to solve their pending problems than Dragic or Leandro do. And attacking the basket is contagious, this is an important trait on a team that often settles for jumpers. I genuinely dig the idea of a Shaq and JB 2nd team dominating their scrubby counterparts and an eventual move to starter.
The expiring contract? Who knows. It could be a pure salary cap move since Sarver loves saving that $$ (re: Deng, Rodriguez).
Portland immediately toughens up their front line, but will have to force Amare to be a POWER forward. Bring back the nasty. Dunk on people’s heads. Everything about the change should be a positive for him. Nate McMillan does an exceptional job getting big results out of his players, the rest of the team has a great attitude, he would be one of the oldest and most experienced players on the squad and would not have to be the star, but could ascend back to that position.
I endorse this trade…unless the Magic have a shot at him.
She doesn’t care what we do…she just wants to spend some time with me.
And that’s how my day went from being at work, to being happy.
Donald! James would have never lifted a hand to me in his life. The life that god took away too soon leaving me with these overgrown kids!
If anyone is getting whupped around here, we all know it’s Penny.
Damn, damn, damn they used this sinister fucking picture of Don on CNN.com.
