nerditry

I can’t understand why you would want to waste your money on this. Be it in the theater or on the bootleg, this movie will not be good.

It can be figured out in a quantifiable manner:

1. The last good M. Night Shyamalan movie was The Sixth Sense. That was his first one. It came out in the previous century. Everything else has generally been straight butt trash. This movie was essentially the last straw for Night as the previous films had all been his stories and was giving creative license on just about all fronts. Airbender is him being given an established set of characters and told to make this happen. Its inevitable failure was not 100% on him as I’ll explain in #2.

My homeboy Ric loves Unbreakable. I think it is watchable, nothing spectacular and the only downfall of that movie is that the folks in charge were probably planning on a sequel which is why it doesn’t feel complete. Like a rush toward an ending to setup future conflict.

Otherwise, it’s a fun romp through Samuel L. Jackson wearing a dyed-black version of Timothy Busfield’s hair in Revenge of the Nerds as Poindexter.

2. Have you ever really enjoyed an animated series that’s been converted to live action?

Did you enjoy what was done to Aeon Flux? Not me. Though Charlize Theron is never wrong.

Did you enjoy Dragonball Evolution? I would not have paid to see that and glad I didn’t. Though I did catch it while coming in and out of a nap during a conference a couple months back. You can’t make a live action Dragonball. A movie done almost entirely on green screen, without an insane budget for effects is going to look like a new version of the Hercules tv show. But not as good in comparison.

The beauty of the animated series is nearly impossible to translate into live action as the actor is now taking over the emotion an artist formerly created.

3. Crappy 3-D. When this ‘enhancement’ is applied after the fact, the movie and viewers automatically lose. Filming in 3-D and having specific scenes which were designed to enhance the effect are key to making the most out of it. Doing it afterward is gimmicky and comes off like a polished turd, telling the audience you weren’t confident in the actual film.

Lastly, if you want to see some quality airbending, take me out for hot wings.

Recipes to follow:

Double Vanilla Almond Pancakes
Double comes from vanilla sugar scented with cleaned vanilla pods and pure vanilla extract

The first picture is just before turning it over, I let half of the bubbles pop and remain open before doing so.

This is how you want a pancake to look if you like a buttery, crispy top.

Linguine with Clams and Sardine &
Shaved Pecorino on a toasted baguette

Two pictures of a turkey breast braised in soy sauce

Dark soy sauce, vegetable stock, sesame oil, sugar, black pepper, red pepper flakes, scallion, garlic, 1 sliced lap cheong sausage, star anise

Lo siento mucho, no pictures this go round.

Last night, posse member Jimmy invited me and the lady to join the rest of the crew over for some grilling at theirs. He says it’s chill and he’s got some burgers ready to go on the grill and plenty of beers, whatever I can bring is just fine.

I’m not going to the store, I’m going freezer, fridge and pantry warrior and figuring out how to maintain my name and still bring something reputable. He’s got the turf handled with burgers, I think let’s surf with the shrimp being patient in the freezer for such an occasion. What else, what else?

Shrimp needs textural contrast, I just picked up some good looking apples at Costco, had some onions in the bullpen and the rest of the odds to make those ends.

Tools:
Cutting board
Knife
Mesh strainer or colander
Medium stockpot
Bowl of ice water
Spatula (bowl scraper)
Large serving bowl

Ingredients:
1 lb shrimp, peeled and deveined (31-35 is about right on)
3 apples cored, peeled, halved

-I used really crisp Pink Lady apples, otherwise use Braeburn, Gala or Granny Smith (adjust the sweetness for Smiths)

1 medium sweet onion, halved on the width
1/2 bell pepper (any color), seeded, ribs removed
1 clove garlic, finely minced
3/4 cup mayonnaise (may need an extra tablespoon or two)
1/4 cup blue cheese dressing

-If you don’t have this, get some good, funky, crumbly cheese and 1/4 cup of full fat sour cream

1/8 cup prepared yellow mustard
1 tbs honey
1 tbs white sugar
1 tsp granulated garlic
1/2 tbs hot sauce

-Here’s the deal. I added some Texas Pete, wasn’t hot enough. Did the remainder with some semi-nuclear hot sauce from a Guyanese friend’s personal recipe.

Large pinch of ground black pepper
2 tbs white vinegar (for poaching liquid)
4 cups of water
1/2 fresh lemon or lime

Let’s Build:

1. Bring 4 cups of water and vinegar up to a fast simmer. Let this sit ready on the stove.

2. Combine mayo, mustard, blue cheese dressing, hot sauce, minced garlic, mustard, honey, white sugar, granulated garlic and black pepper. Let this chill out so the flavors can combine for 15-20 minutes.

3. Slice the onion into half moons as thinly as you possibly can. Sharp knives make your work easier and the kitchen safer. Place in the serving bowl.

4. Since the apples into half moons, 1/8″ thickness. Place in the serving bowl and squeeze the lemon/lime to keep them from oxidizing (turning brown).

5. Finely dice the bell pepper. You thought it wasn’t going in the bowl?

6. Add the shrimp to the poaching liquid, cook NO MORE THAN 45 SECONDS!

7. Immediately drain the shrimp and add to the ice water to halt their cooking.

8. Once the shrimp has cooled, add it to the apples, onions and peppers.

9. Add half of the dressing, gently…GENTLY! stir it through. If you’re hesitant about how to gently mix it, use your hands instead of the spatula.

10. Continue adding dressing until you like the consistency.

11. Cover the bowl tightly with plastic wrap and refrigerate it for at least an hour.

So, this dish was very popular, infinitely gratifying for me as a cook since it all came off the top. Here’s some thoughts I had afterward on variations.

1. Use the sour cream, omit the blue cheese, add 1/2 tbs jamaican curry powder.

2. Toast and add halves of walnuts or pecans.

3. Omit hot sauce, add hot chiles diced as finely as possible to suit your own tastes.

4. Replace shrimp with poached bay scallops or poached and shredded chicken (dark meat).

Hope you have a chance to try this fantastic salad. Make sure you report back on the rave reviews!

I grew up hating spaghetti and tomato sauce. We never had any sauce which hadn’t originated in a jar and it was dressed up mostly with chopped up veg like mushrooms, green peppers and onions. Buuuuut, none of those were usually cooked prior to inclusion in the sauce, so they didn’t add much and were more of a klugey obstacle in a boring dish.

Also, I really have never dug the food served at Southern Italian restaurants which were some combination of mozzarella, red sauce and pasta. Same way that I’m generally not down with Mexican restaurants which (stolen from Jim Gaffigan) are any combination of beans, meat, tortilla, lettuce, tomato, shredded cheese and mebbe the orange-tinted rice (though I really like the way those places make fajitas since I can’t replicate them at home).

My challenge is often to see how good of a meal I can make in the time in between getting home from work (30-45 minute drive) and when I’m out of patience to do anything other than eat. So I look not for shortcuts, but alternate methods of quality cooking in a condensed period of time. A pressure cooker mentality applied to other methods and techniques. From that, I turned my desire to make an excellent, long simmered red sauce into a 30 minute, chunky tomato sauce that turns the switch on a regular pasta dinner.

Roasted Tomato and Red Cubanelle Sauce

Tools:
Knife
Broiler pan covered tightly with aluminum foil
Spatula (not pancake turner)
Cutting Board
Food Processor (Or a blender)

Ingredients:
1 large red Cubanelle pepper, seeded, cut in half lengthwise
4 medium tomatoes, ripe, quartered, seeded
4 fresh garlic cloves, minced
1/2 tbs dried oregano
1/2 tbs dried thyme
1 tsp dried red chili flakes
3 whole black peppercorns
Olive oil

1. Preheat broiler and place rack on 2nd highest row.

2. Combine last six ingredients in mortar and pestle, grind into a paste. Marinate tomatoes and peppers for 15 minutes.

3. Place vegetables on broiler pan with enough space so they aren’t touching.

4. Roast until skins start to char.

5. Turn vegetables over to opposite side until lightly charred.

6. Place hot vegetables and marinade in food processor, pulse until halfway to desired consistency.

7. Add salt and more olive oil to taste, pulse to desired consistency.

8. Serve hot over hot pasta or let cool to room temperature.

This will keep in your fridge for a day or so. I don’t anticipate it lasting that long.

These are what I had available the first time I devised the recipe. If you happen to have onions available, use a small one or half a medium cut into quarters before roasting. If you’ve got fresh herbs, add some of those when it goes into the food processor.

Leftover wings went for lunch today and I managed to abstain from decorating my shirt with it. So continuing my tour of Asia, we look farther East to Thailand on the map and farther back in my pantry for ingredients.

Tools:
Large sautee pan with lid, high sides preferred.
Knife
Can opener
Stirring spoon

Ingredients:
114g Can of Maesri Masaman Curry Paste
1/2 to 1 lb peeled, deveined shrimp
14 oz can of coconut milk
1″ fresh ginger, sliced into 4 pieces then smashed
5 small green chilis, stem removed and smashed
1/2 lb potatoes, .25″ dice
1/2 cup warm water
2 tbs cooking oil

1. Add cooking oil to cold pan and heat medium low.

2. Add curry paste and stir for 2 minutes to evenly coat the bottom of the pan.

3. Add half the can of coconut milk, ginger & chilis and slowly stir through curry paste to evenly combine.

4. Heat until lightly simmering, add potatoes, remaining coconut milk, water and potatoes. Stir to combine.

5. Cover and simmer 15 minutes.

6. Add shrimp, stir through to coat with curry and cover again for 5 minutes.

Serve with bread or rice.

Makhani Butter Chicken Wings Closeup

Wings have gotten expensive. $2.59/lb at Publix including a $.20/lb discount is pretty high. These prices seem like nearly double what I was paying a couple of years ago. At that time, I was trying to do wings in the oven which is really good when you don’t want the grease and mess of deep frying.

Tonight’s recipe starts with a packet of Shan’s Butter Chicken mix (if you were inclined to buy online from MyEthnicGrocer). Instead of using the instructions, I took the leftover uncooked wings over their option of bite size pieces of chopped chicken and reworked the recipe a touch.

Ingredients:
1-1.5 lb separated chicken wings
1 box Shan Butter Chicken mix
2/3 cup milk
1/3 cup melted butter
1 large onion, halved lengthwise and sliced about .25″
2 cups of pureed tomatoes, no skins or seeds, passed through a sieve once more.
Cooking oil (I used olive)

Tools:
Large saute pan with lid or dutch oven with lid
Tongs
Wooden spoon
Knife

1. Marinate the chicken in a large ziploc bag using the entirety of the spice packet, with a tablespoon each of oil and water. Seal the bag and mix until all of the chicken is coated. Marinate overnight in fridge.

2. Brown the chicken wings in between medium-medium high till crispy on each side, probably in two batches.

3. Remove the wings and add the onions, saute momentarily until soft.

4. Add the milk, melted butter and tomato puree and bring to a light boil.

5. Add the wings back in, lower to medium and cover.

6. After 10 minutes, spoon the sauce on top of the wings, cover 15 more minutes.

7. Serve with potatoes or rice and spicy naan.

Makhani Butter Chicken Wings with Potatoes and Spicy Naan

I’ve got two bacon-centric projects. Both of which I now believe will require me to buy some fresh pork belly.

1. Bacon Sausage
I’m planning on getting cured bacon and keeping the ratio as close to regular sausage as possible between lean and fat (75/25). Bacon fat has so much flavor in it already and is a sturdy white fat.

The goal here will be to take slab bacon, preferably already smoked and grind it for the casing. After making links, I’ll steam or poach it to firm up the shape and remove the casing in anticipation of grilling or frying. Also might consider doing it all raw to start and then smoking the finished links to cook at the way through.

2. Bacon Butter
I’d like to emulsify the bacon into a spreadable paste for bread or your significant other. Bonus that it can sit out in room temp as it’s already “cooked” by the curing or smoking and doubles as a cooking fat if you don’t want to use regular butter or olive oil. Instant rendered fat and nicer looking than the mason jar or old can on the stove for holding those (mostly fat) drippings.

For real, I’m in a mode this summer.

Via our friends at Slashfood is a time for you to play dress up in public and get something delicious from chicken sandwich kingpin Chick-Fil-A.

My friend Thomas moved to NYC and one of the first things missed and searched out with a purpose was Chik-Fil-A (also Arby’s). Also the busiest drive through I’ve ever seen at a location in Prince George’s County, Maryland.

While we’re on the subject of fast food, let me show you the present that has passed you by. I’m done with saying something is the future if it already exists, I hear this all the time in reference to things that change with popular culture like music, architecture, fashion, auto design. If you can put your hands on it now, what’s going to come out of that is the future.

The Ghetto Big Mac is a sign of the times and a harbinger of innovation. Respect to these dude’s ladies for enduring what could only have been cataclysmic.

Does Charlie V just step in and take over Sheed’s spot?

Makes sense. Charlie is reminiscent of Sheed at the point in his career that he got traded to Detroit. He’s adept at stretching the floor to setup outside shooting and send the ball back around the horn if needed. No one has CV confused with a true PF, so again the weight for that falls on Maxiell and Prince depending on whether they resign McDyess or another big man (Gortat?).

Does Gordon start or come off the bench?

Neither makes sense right now. Rip isn’t quick enough, nor does he have the handles to get moved to starting PG. That means Stuckey remains the primary PG and now there’s a log jam. Rip was beside himself over his benching last season and now is stuck in the middle of Joe Dumars and a head coach walking into a tenuous scenario.

If Gordon is their 6th man, Will Bynum and he will comprise the smallest current backcourt I can recall since Courtney Lee and Jameer didn’t play much together. At the end of last season, Bynum found a lot of success in using his strength to create space and attack the basket. If this means that he’ll be getting a lot of assists kicking it back out to Gordon, they give other second units a ton of trouble.

It’s also known that once Ben Gordon gets the ball, it disappears into a black hole until it magically appears in a descent toward the basket.

Does Tayshaun get some extra money for having to again cover his teammates’ defensive mistakes and lapses?

Charlie and Ben aren’t know for being great on the ball defenders and in this system, will again be guarding much bigger players. Prince has to be exhausted. He’s played as many games as any player I can think of on a per-season basis. 82 games in all seasons but his rookie year, nearly 20 playoff games per season except for this year’s sweep by the Cavs.

Please, someone give this guy a rest.

Chicago has to be breathing a sigh of relief.

They now have a well structured team of players. Aside from Brad Miller, they get a ton of dead weight off the books after the end of this season (Jerome James, Tim Thomas, Aaron Gray) and Miller’s contract is $12M expiring. I’d resign him if possible at the MLE if he keeps playing at the level he did against Boston.

They’re going to have a good amount of money to sign a FA this off season, definitely need to target another veteran guard. Maybe even cobbling together a couple of their $6M (Thomas, James) expiring contracts to the Blazers for Bayless/Webster/Blake (expiring, too).

Rose/Salmons(or Hinrich)/Deng/Thomas/Noah?

Very good reporting by Erika Hobbs of the Orlando Sentinel whose investigative desk has been combing through the vast amount of Central Florida muck this year.

Her article looks into why the State Attorney’s office has decided not to look further into allegations of public corruption by a former official from Orange County Public Schools. As a basketball fan, I was taken to a less than happy place by School District Attorney Frank Kruppenbacher’s statement which eerily mirrors that of NBA Capo di Tutti Capi and Don of All Dons, Commissioner David Stern.

School District Attorney Frank Kruppenbacher said he thinks the allegations against Gaston are “an isolated incident,” but he wants to ensure there were not systemic problems with the school district’s contract and bidding process.

“We did a massive look when this first came out,” he said. “We combed a ton of documents and records and could find no evidence that this was anything other than rogue conduct by one individual.”

Let’s compare that to:

David Stern blamed a “rogue, isolated criminal” Tuesday for a betting scandal that has devastated the league and threatened the credibility of every referee.

A subdued Stern said he felt betrayed by former referee Tim Donaghy, the target of an FBI investigation for allegedly betting on games, including some he officiated, over the last two seasons.

Stern said he believed no other officials or players would be implicated in the betting scandal.

Fun, eh?

I can’t imagine it’s an isolated incident that every one of our public/private groups has problems with people that just can’t seem to separate themselves from the PUBLIC monies they’re asked to manage. As if management of that money entitles them to personal access.

It’s the sense of entitlement regarding money that “comes from nowhere,” so no one will miss it and it doesn’t really “belong” to anyone. There seems to be a great deal of resentment amongst Orlando’s public officials who are reticent to admit that we are a one-horse town and that they have no real control over Disney. No one truly cares about the tech corridor in Lake Mary, or the defense research by UCF because none of those would be there, had the mouse not established our town.

And let’s be frank, Disney is NOT IN ORLANDO. Disney has so much swag, pull, clout, stroke that they operate a tiny, but immensely powerful government known as the Reedy Creek Improvement District. Good for them because I wouldn’t let anyone in our local government help them decide the ply of EPCOT’s toilet paper.

It’s a two-bit town that is mismanaged from the top, and takes its cues from My Two Dads. Yes, the seminal 80s sitcom with Greg Evigan and Paul Reiser. The one where they both banged some slut of a woman who didn’t know which was the father of the girl the two “roommates” eventually adopted.

The City of Orlando has a mayor, and his name is BUDDY! Orange County has a mayor, and his name is RICH CROTTY! Rich manages to spend a lot of his time on poorly run commissions and authorities, figuring out how he can elevate himself to higher and even more disappointing election to a higher office. Buddy likes to make stupid bets with LA Mayor Antonio Villaraigosa that make our town look even dumber.

These two manage to get less than nothing done in the best interests of Orlando. People that promise us lots of financial benefits from their involvement like Rich DeVos, Cameron Kuhn and Lou Perlman got insanely rich, or even more insanely rich (dead broke as far as Kuhn and Perlman ended up) have their best interests taken care of.

To quote Owen Hart…”Enough is enough, AND IT’S TIME FOR A CHANGE!”

He was also a wrestler that died after falling from the rafters into the ring.